


I'm Sorry

by StarbrightAngel



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Apologies, Connor Deserves Happiness, Gen, Guilt, Headcanon, Poor Connor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-02-23 05:23:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23839738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarbrightAngel/pseuds/StarbrightAngel
Summary: After Markus finishes his speech at Woodward Church, Connor notices Kara sitting on one of the pews.
Relationships: Connor & Kara (Detroit: Become Human), Kara & Alice Williams (Detroit: Become Human)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 39





	I'm Sorry

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a headcanon I have that Connor, in the Pacifist Best Ending timeline, does still apologize to Kara in the church.

_"Are you ready to follow me?"_  
The church exploded into cheers. Any androids that were able leapt up from their seats, roaring with enthusiasm. Someone in the back began an impromptu chant of _"MARKUS, MARKUS, MARKUS!"_ and soon enough, everyone else joined in.  
Connor trotted slowly forward so he was standing in front of the stage, noticing in a vague sort of way that North, Simon and Josh had done the same, all four of them staring up at the deviant leader with admiration. Connor didn't join in the cheering and chanting—just wasn't the type—but his eyes were full of reverence as he gazed up at Markus, standing on the altar, his face hardened with determination.  
Once the crowd quieted again, and Markus stepped down off the altar, heading over to speak with North, Connor let out a faint sigh and turned around, eyes scanning over the church. Connor felt so... out of place, here. Not just that, but it was like he felt out of place _in his own body._ Everything seemed so different, like he was moving through a dream. Standing amongst all these deviants, in the clothes he'd worn to infiltrate Jericho (a prickle of guilt sparked through his systems— _guilt_ , a human emotion, how long had he been _feeling_ like this?), he felt like he was someone else, an outsider looking in. Like he was no longer Connor, but another person entirely.  
...Person.  
 _I am a person._  
As the RK800's eyes drifted aimlessly about, not really looking for anything, but rather just _looking_ , his gaze fell on two people, sitting side by side, all by themselves. A woman with short blonde hair, and a little girl with a brunette ponytail, cuddled up into her side.  
Connor froze.

_"HEY! Where you goin'?!"_

_"I can't let them get away!"_

_"They won't. They'll never make it to the other side."_

_"I can't take that chance—!"_

_"HEY, YOU WILL GET YOURSELF KILLED! Do NOT go after 'em Connor, that's an order!—CONNOR, GODDAMMIT—!"_

It was fortunate that androids didn't actually need oxygen to survive, because Connor had stopped breathing the moment his eyes had fell on the AX400—on _Kara_. He'd seen her at Jericho, along with several others that he recognized (Rupert, the two Tracis from the Eden Club), but he hadn't been deviant when he saw her then, had been so focused on his mission that seeing her face only made him think, _Don't catch her attention, don't let her recognize you._ He hadn't really stopped to think about that day, when he'd chased her across the highway, when he'd come _so close_ to catching her, her _and_ that poor YK500 she was trying to protect.  
And then, suddenly, he found himself walking towards her, his legs feeling numb (did he even _have_ the ability to _feel numb_ like that?) but still carrying him forward, step after determined step, until he was standing just a few feet away from them.  
Slowly, that blonde head of hair lifted, revealing a pale face and big, gentle blue eyes. The YK500—Alice, his scanner told him—looked up as well, slower, and her eyes were more fearful, a small hand clutching tighter into Kara's larger one.  
"...I thought I'd killed you on that highway," Connor managed at last, his voice coming out quiet, quiet and ridden with guilt. And he really had thought he'd killed them; when Kara shoved him away, and he'd narrowly avoided getting smashed by a truck, he'd lost sight of them momentarily. And when he lifted his head again, looking one way and then the other, he'd assumed when he didn't see them that they'd fallen victim to the traffic, that they'd been hit by one of the vehicles speeding down the highway, the momentum carrying them out of Connor's field of view. "I'm sorry I put your lives in danger."  
There was a long, pregnant pause, a strange sensation building in the back of Connor's throat, something that made it difficult for him to speak, something that made his chest burn and ache. Trying not to let it deter him (because damn it, no amount of apologies could make up for the fact that he'd nearly killed them both, but he still wanted to let them know he was sorry), he slowly, slowly dropped into a crouch, the position putting him at eyelevel with Alice.  
"I was just a machine," he murmured, "taking orders..." His brows furrowed, chocolate irises shifting from Alice's face to Kara's. "...It wasn't really _me..._ "  
Silence. Connor really expected nothing less, but it still made his chest twist painfully, made his whole body feel heavy. He pushed himself back up to a standing position.  
"What are you going to do now?"  
Kara didn't respond for a few seconds. She lowered her eyes, shook her head a little. She looked so _lost_ —they _both_ looked so incredibly _lost_ —and he wanted to help, but what could he do, the infamous ex-Deviant Hunter?  
"...Getting Alice away from here is all that matters now," she said at last. Her voice was soft, gentle, and it occurred to Connor that he'd never actually heard her speak before. It was a mother's voice. Fitting, he supposed. "We have to catch the last bus. We might still have a chance to cross the border."  
_Cross the border_ —the Canadian border, Connor assumed. There were no android laws in Canada; androids were free to live as people, there. It was a good place to start fresh. A safe place. He wasn't surprised to hear that they were headed there.  
"I hope you make it out safely," he said, with every ounce of sincerity in his body. "You deserve some happiness..." He offered them both a faint smile, despite the pain and guilt crushing his heart, "...after all you've been through."  
And again—silence. They stayed huddled together, looking up at him, uncertain, _afraid_. He'd tortured them long enough with his presence, he figured, and, with a low exhale of breath, he turned away, his footsteps quiet on the granite floor as he walked off.  
The subtle look of fear on their faces was burned into his mind's eye.  
 _...I have to fix this. I have to make up for everything I've done..._  
Connor lifted his hands, staring down at them.  
He clenched them into fists.  
 _...Even if I have to give my life._

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback would be greatly appreciated. <3


End file.
